Sometimes the best place to start is to realise that you don't know. That you don't even know who you are. That you don't understand love and life. That you are LOST...
Yeah, that is a biggie when you are staring the illusion of you right in the face.
Blimey ! From saying "I am fine" to 'I don't know who I am' is pretty intense stuff.
The beautiful thing is that by asking yourself the third question, you have already started to find your way out of the fog of your ILLUSIVE IDENTITY because you started to understand you.
Your confusion is just the beginning of clarity, as much as a breakdown means a breakthrough is imminent. All you need to do from now on is to KEEP GOING and understand more about yourself.
Ready for the ride? Yes, this is the roller-coaster of all the LOWS preceeding the highs, so buckle up your seatbelt!
Understanding your mind is a great place to start. And for that you need to be alone...
I hear you gasping for air. Yes, firstly you will need to confront your fear of being alone and realise WHY you are running away from yourself. You will have to confront this issue sooner or later if you want to be truly happy as supposed to creating conditions for the happiness of others.
Your Inner Child is very scared, but notice that you are not the hepless infant anymore. You are a responsible adult and your main responsibility is for to CARE for yourself.
On this, seemingly scary and unexciting journey, you learn about the YOU you thought you were. You get to know your Ego, and by realising who you are NOT, you will get to meet the you you truly are!
Understanding how your thoughts contribute to how you feel, you learn a gret deal about your emotions. But you will have to practice working with them as supposed to allowing them woking against you. It takes time to learn how to control your thoughts, practicing changing chosen focus - hence reality. Untill you really master this, you will be dealing with a lot of emotional stuff! You must use your emotions to heal yourself, as supposed to destroy that is left from you. Your peace depends on how you manage your mind (and IF you can crack your false belief system) as much as managing your heart (and the love your have for yourself) depends on mastering forgiveness for, and patience with, yourself.
Promisses and vows to yourself have to be followed through which is much easier said then done.
Conscious REALISATIONS (which my whole website is based on BTW) are crucial, yet they take time to sink in to your subconsious for you to really grasp things. YOU CANNOT RUSH THIS PROCESS. Trust that everything has its own time and comes to you when you are ready.
PRACTICE is the hardest final part of this process because you are challenging your habits, which is always met with tuns of RESISTANCE and excuses as to why you will do what you used to do.
Perhaps the most important thing you learn in this process is that dishonesty or denial about how you feel will get you nowhere.
Through getting authentically connected to HOW YOU FEEL deep down, you get to work in line with your intuition and inner knowing. You get to bridge the gap between your mind and soul through your heart.
You know that putting your heart into whatever you do fulfils you, anchors you in the present moment, and allows you to feel the joy of simply being. Being without having something, without expecting or needing something from someone else, without wanting to be different. You learn about the illusion of time and the true meaning of the words 'I AM' we use daily but rarely realise their true meaning. You learn the difference between survival and living, how it feels to be awake, and how much of your life you were actually asleep...
By understanding your automatic reactions, learning a great deal about your triggers, you become more conscious of your choices. Knowing that you can choose puts you firmly into the driving seat of your life which was prior to this realisation largely occupied by your Ego - your scared, insecure and victimised Self. Now that is when you start to feel truly empowered, knowing that no one else but YOU are shaping every moment of your life. Yes, there are circumstances, but you learn that your either consciously act on them BY CHOICE, or you REACT the way you have always done.
Be prepared to slip and fail many times before you master this at least partially. Yes it is frustrating sometimes but this is where your best palls - patience and forgiveness - come to save you. They are your angels protecting you from the guilt and shame, from self-hatred and ongoing resentment. You learn about your anger and how to restore your inner and outer boundaries so that you feel protected, happy and peaceful.
You learn so much about yourself in this process!
About your true desires, forgotten talents, needs and how some of those are unhealthy. You will need to focus on those if you like to cut yourself loose off your insecurities and HEAL. Your emotional wounds (your past hurt) are the invisible strings tying you to the abuse. The abuse you will otherwise suffer mainly by your own hand as you allow that to take place.
And you thought love hurts, didn't you ? Well no, but the truth can, and will, because by getting in touch with your true desires, you suddenly feel whenever you are going AGAINST yourself. And now that you know and feel what is RIGHT for you, you know exactly WHY you are feeling miserable.
Your inner dis-ease is very much related to self-betrayal, which hurts now even more as you are fully emotionally connected to yourself...
Continue to part 3
Thank you for reading. If my article contributed to understanding yourself, please be generous and share it with others.
Copyright © 2017 Michaela Patel
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