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  • Michaela Patel

VICTIM


The only way to a TRUE love is through honesty.

Admitting that you feel hurt by life, that you feel somehow incomplete. The only way you can heal is that you admit the truth about your own thoughts and feelings. About your family and work circumstances. About the state of your relationships - how you feel about your partner, your friends. Admitting you are unhappy. Admitting that your feel disappointed in others...yourself! Disappointed because you were pretending all this time - to others, and to yourself...

And it may well be the hardest thing you had to do so far...

Emotional pain of facing the disappointment in yourself is far worse than being disappointed in others. Because your own shortfall is very personal to you. Because at that point you realise what being responsible really means. For yourself first and foremost!

You can see that you are solely responsible for your situation: YOU put yourself in that place, YOU allowed others to keep you there, YOU agreed to a maltreatment by your partner, boss, or a friend.

At this stage you stop being angry at others...

You get angry at yourself for allowing others treat you that way. You feel upset for treating yourself badly...

What you feel is an emotional turmoil of an AWAKENING from your victim role. The role you loved to play for such a long time because that was all you knew. Because it felt comfortable...

See, us humans, we like to do familiar things. We don't really like change. And although we feel miserable we rather stick to what we know than face the unknown. We rather stick to our misery because it's predictable.

Why? Because we are scared! Scared to change. Scared to grow... Scared to be truly happy.

But what we are really scared of is OURSELVES. We are scared of our own power. We fear what we can do, what we could achieve!

So we stay small and complain that life and people treat us bad. Because that's predictable: we get sympathy and attention for being miserable. We go around and gather acknowledgements of our own misery. Because we need to feed our INSECURITY of feeling unloved and not good enough. We need a confirmation of our own unworthiness so that we can continue to complain about the world, so that we can dump our emotional baggage onto others. So we can point our finger at others and blame them for our situation because that way we are officially 'off the hook'...

What would happen if we suddenly realised that we are worthy, good enough? That we are powerful and fully capable of care, capable to love ourselves? That we are solely responsible for ourselves? 'Oh God, NO! Thank you very much, I will rather stay unhappy!"

The choice really is between being powerful, and being miserable and small. Unfortunately, so many of us choose the later....

The braver and more intelligent of us, who can see that if they want to be truly happy they have to take control over their lives (rather than leaving it to others!), a new space opens up - a reward for their honesty and bravery: they experience their authentic power.

Thanks to their determination and perseverance to get to the Truth, on wings of faith in their own abilities, they take off and fly. They are free, and nothing and no one can stop them. Free of the baggage of who they thought they were - their victim.

Thank you for reading. If my article contributed to understanding yourself, please be generous and share it with others.

Copyright © 2016 Michaela Patel

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